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Gracious Uncertainty
Joe Killian • Apr 30, 2020
It wasn't supposed to be like this. For almost six years as I toiled to write the book, I dreamed of getting out on the road and sharing the message God had given me. In the months just before publication I began to make plans for promoting the book. I even took an online course about how to build an "Author Platform". During a trip to the publisher in Florida I was really encouraged when the agent we were meeting with got excited when I described myself as a speaker who writes. It seemed to energize her and she shared my statement with other staff members. Many authors are overwhelmed and intimidated with the prospect of having to speak about their books. I not only knew what it meant to have a platform, I was experienced at speaking and looking forward to doing it. Our Journey WITH God
was sure to be a hit!
But, God had other plans...
Even before the book was published God opened the door for me to do coaching for two different local parishes. This wasn't what I expected but I eagerly jumped in. This was an opportunity to do a deep dive into the content of Our Journey WITH God with those I was coaching. And I was learning a ton. What great material for my talks! Even in the midst of my busy coaching schedule, which included as many as 12-14 sessions a week, I was cognizant of my desire to build my "author's platform". I couldn't wait to go on tour to share all God had given to me. I remembered how much I enjoyed my years on the corporate speaking circuit and now I had a message of eternal importance! Let's get going, Lord!!
But, God had other plans.
Even though I was really busy with my coaching I was still striving to come up with plans to promote the book. But as Fall moved into Winter, I was hearing a clear and consistent message that God wanted me to wait. Additionally, I was becoming more and more clear through my coaching that He was revealing an almost singular message. We are first and foremost called to––BE! "So Lord you're asking me to wait on you, and while I'm doing so, to simply be with you?"
I have to be honest, this has been really hard for me, especially in the midst of the quarantine. That's why I wanted to share this message with you. We are all having to wait and we aren't even sure what it is we are waiting for because everything has changed. This morning I was reading My Utmost For His Highest, a devotional by Oswald Chambers. It was entitled Gracious Uncertainty and this is the verse it is based on:
...it has not yet been revealed what we shall be... 1 John 3:2
This verse and Chambers' words really resonated with me, "Certainty is the mark of the commonsense life––gracious uncertainty is the mark of the spiritual life. To be certain of God means that we are uncertain in all our ways, not knowing what tomorrow may bring." That's it! Just as I wrote in the end of Our Journey WITH God, He reveals things in His time. That was the most consistently profound insight for the people that I was coaching. They could look back through their own life's stories and see how God had always been with them and in those moments of revelation they saw what it meant to "be" as God created them to be. We are created to be. Regardless of what happens in and around us we must acknowledge that God is always with us.
When we do, we live with gracious uncertainty.
The story continues...I'm still working on the pondless waterfall in our front yard. I shared this project with you two weeks ago in Playin' In the Dirt. Since then I've had to rework sections of the stream three different times because we were losing too much water. I am now an expert on evaporation rates and excessive splash, two causes of water loss. This morning I tore the whole thing apart and I'm starting over.
Have you ever watched DreamWorks Animation's Kung Fu Panda? I stumbled across it recently and thoroughly enjoyed Jack Black's performance as a bumbling, noodle selling, kung fu enthusiast, giant panda named P o. Set in ancient China, it is more than a humorous slapstick comedy. The core message of the story jumped out at me as I have been focusing recently on the concept of being. Po is shockingly identified as the Dragon Warrior and he reluctantly enters training. The goal of the training is to receive the Dragon Scroll, which is believed to hold the secret to limitless power. Now I don't want to spoil the big reveal but I will say that what Po realizes is the same as what I speak to in the concept of being and authentic identity. So, where do we find the secret to our "power?" I praise You, because I am wonderfully made; wonderful are Your works! My very self You know. Psalm 139:14 God knows it; and we must seek Him with all of our hearts in order to find it. As it was in the movie, the answer is stunningly simple. Our authentic identity is already within us. The challenge for Po in the movie was in seeing himself accurately and not the way others saw him. Even his teacher scoffed at the idea that Po was anything more than an underachieving dreamer who overate when he was anxious. Po's problems are rooted in the fact that he believes the lie of his false identity much more than he does his authentic one. Is it possible that you do the same? Who could have imagined that beneath all of Po's girth lived the Dragon Warrior? What's hidden from view in you? Seek God for understanding as to who He created you to be. Spoiler Alert: the secret of your limitless power is already in you. God placed it there and He wants you to be who He authentically created you to be.
Maria and I have been playing in the dirt a lot recently. First we replaced our French drain and then we embarked on a creative project intended to change the entire look of our front yard. My brother Jeffrey and I installed a new front step.
